As the New Year approaches, it’s that dreaded time of year when we indulge in retrospection and take a long hard look at some of our life choices over the past 12 months. New Year’s resolutions are the perfect opportunity to set goals for ourselves and plan to start the year off on a good note. Order that “abdominizer,” become a vegan, learn French. The options are endless.


According to a study conducted by the University of Scranton, 23% of people quit their resolution after just one week, with only 19% of individuals sticking to their goal over the long term. With that in mind, here are some amusing New Year’s resolutions shared on Twitter today by a few individuals who have this all figured out.

1. A universal one to start us off

2. A little privacy

3. This is actually sound advice

4. A little too ambitious

5. Did I write this?

6. But how will you connote tone?!

7. The classic

8. Someone who knows how to aim high

9. The dream

10. A neighborly thought

11. An attainable goal

12. The resolution we’ve all considered at some point

13. A literary aim

14. An inexplicable idea

If you insist on more standard New Year’s resolutions, these 10 apps will help you stick to them in 2020.